Reflections of the Celebration of the Life of Jo Ann Davis

Living in Lubbock has several drawbacks when you need to attend something in Austin. More like 382 drawbacks. As in miles.

There is a plus in this, however, and that is you have plenty of time to think as your drive home. Here are some reflections on the events of the last day, in no particular order.

• I was struck how much I agreed with the comments Roger and Rayford made about Jo Ann being such a Godly woman. Her being Godly was not as remarkable to me as the fact that that reality is so ingrained in my mind. Growing up, I never thought: Wow, Mrs. Davis is a very Godly woman. At least, I do not recall every thinking that. At that period in my life, moms were rated more on the food they served at Sunday Night Devotional than things that had eternal significance. But I knew it. Knew it very, very much. That realization is a little scary for me as a parent. I recognize that Jo Ann's influence was so strong that even though I may have never articulated it, it was very real and very present. What do/will my children's friends say about me? More importantly, what will they know about me at their very core, even when they do not or perhaps can not say it?
• Speaking of Roger, I always think he does such an excellent job putting into words the thoughts that need to be expressed. I mentioned this to Jana and she commented that he is so believable. I think it is this, plus also a gift in understanding the moment and knowing what emotions are present. There is also certainly a gift of then being able to express those things. Thanks, Roger, for letting God use you in these powerful ways.
• Tasha M. was the first to articulate this, so I need to give her credit, but the visitation and funeral was what I would call "Old School Brentwood." And I think I would say Brentwood instead of Brentwood Oaks (no offense, late arrivers). The place was full of people who knew that building on Arroyo Seca. These were people who had been such an integral part of the life of this congregation for a long, long time.
• I was reminded by the many interactions I had with these people how much of a debt I owe to Brentwood for my faith formation. I cannot articulate - and I kick myself for not being able to do so - the specific ways individuals have helped shape me. I certainly do not live up to their training more times than not, but am so deeply grateful for what that congregation has given me. These are people who loved me, who have taken care of me, who have treated me like their own son, who have taught me, who have nurtured me, who have spent countless unknown hours in prayer for me. I am eternally blessed for my having been able to be a part of that community and for the ways I still have a place there.
• Jo Ann hosted our wedding shower in Austin. That was special to Jana and me.
• Jo Ann's home was always a place where you felt welcome and even as a child, you always knew it was a special home. I acted differently when I was at the Davis'. I never felt like I had to, but because Mrs. Davis was such a woman of grace, dignity, and class, you wanted to be on your best behavior.
• I also always felt like I was in the home of a celebrity because Jo Ann's kitchen was featured in Southern Living.
• I got to visit with Ben B. at the visitation. I hate to admit that I am not sure I could list out all of the people for whom I participated in their baptism, much less remember all of the baptisms I have seen. I will never, ever, ever forget Ben's baptism. I am not even sure I knew all of the circumstances surrounding his baptism, but even as an 8th grader or freshman (it was one of those years) I recognized the sacredness of that moment. I type this with tears rolling down my cheeks, it has such a powerful impact on me.
• Ben was one of those who I can articulate the way he and Laura impacted me, even beyond his baptism. When Branch Groups were in the early stages, we were in a group with Ben and Laura among other "older" adults. I was really concerned about this, because our group was not made up of people my age or people I hung out with. I hope I was not a typical teenager and a pain in the rump about groups, but I am pretty certain at least Mom and Dad knew I was not happy about this arrangement. I did, however, love being a part of this group!I learned more from being with this mix of people than I ever would have in a group of "my people." Ben continued to keep in touch with me, even going so far as to take me to breakfast when work took him to Abilene. Even at the visitation, Ben made me feel like I was important to him. I am grateful for that and for that example.
• I can remember staying with Glen and Craig in "The Zoo" on trips to Abilene. I am not sure I have ever said thank you to them and to Donovan and so many like them for the example they provided for those of us who followed them through the youth group.
• It is sort of hard for me to fathom that I have known John Scott longer than anyone else in the world, save relatives. When you get my age, you realize that is a LONG time!
• Speaking of aging, when the youth group had our reunion last year, I commented on the fact that some people have not changed one bit - Greg R., for example. I wasn't around the parents then, but realize that the same holds true for the parents and older people of the congregation. Some look older, some look like life has been hard on them over the years, and some look like time has just stood still.
• John Scott married above himself. We all did, but when you hear the things said about his mom, you realize where he got the criteria he did for his own mate. He did well!
  

I realize at this point you are wishing Lubbock was only 82 miles from Austin, so I will close with this.

I am grateful that God allowed us the honor and privilege of knowing Jo Ann. The entire Davis family has been such a blessing to so many families, especially mine. From that first Easter Sunday we were in Austin and ate at the Davis' -- which I do not even remember, I just have seen the pictures and heard the stories of John Scott falling in the creek -- to a friendship with John Scott that has been through an entire life together and reconnects in seconds, regardless of the amount of time it has been since we have actually spoken, I have been blessed. Thank you Lord for the life of Jo Ann, a life of grace, mercy, and service, and a life that continues to be exhibited in Ross, their children and their grandchildren. May those of us who have been touched by her life show her the greatest honor we can by living a life of faith as she did.

The Bittersweet Finale

Last night was Luke's final T-ball game. I have mentioned that I was the accidental coach, but have loved the opportunity and even told the original coach that I would coach "Coach Pitch" with him next year if he wanted. He said he would, but only if I would be the head coach from the beginning.

The sweet part of the finale was that we had a good season. I think we learned some things about baseball and I know we had fun. (I say we because I think the players did and I KNOW I did.) We tried to share the wealth and let everyone play every position, even on the days when I would have much rather had Luke or Teigan on the mound. I think the kids came away with a sense of respect for the coaches and the parents commented several times on the good job we had done. I believe many of the things I wanted to accomplish and liked about coaching that I mentioned here came to pass. It was a good season.

The bitter part of the finale was two-fold. First, is the realization that next year is "Coach Pitch" and then who knows what from there. LCAA offers the coach pitch and we will most likely play that, so many of the good aspects will still be in place, but it is a vivid reminder to me that Luke is getting older. With that also comes the knowledge that if he wants to continue to play, he will soon have to move to a competitive league. This tension for me was highlighted on our way to the after-season party when Luke says: "Dad, I think I am going to play baseball all my life like you did soccer. I want to see all of your trophies when we get home." I told him that I thought he probably already had more trophies than I had received my entire life. "You mean you didn't get a trophy every year you played like at LCAA?" Well, no, actually, I didn't. In fact, most leagues give trophies only to the best teams and they keep score and everyone doesn't get to bat every game and the good guys get to play... If it is time for that transition, it is time, but I sure have enjoyed getting to answer the end of game question with, "Well, everyone won. You had fun, didn't you?"

The second part of the bitter is more personal. I realize that T-ball is a small part of the lives of these kids and do not pretend that I made any difference in their lives besides help create/sustain an environment where they could have fun, be encouraged, and enjoy getting to play, even when they may not have been very skilled at playing. There was, however, a part of me that was depressed last night as I compared what I do for a living to what I did as a volunteer and accidental coach. I felt much better about 10 1-hour games and a couple of practices than many of my days at the office. Cognitively, I recognize that my job as a fund raiser makes a difference in the lives of college students. (It allows them to get a quality education in a Christian environment ... doesn't every letter I write say this?) I know changing lives is something more than just a catchy slogan on our business cards. I do wonder, however, how effective I really am at changing lives. On a larger scale, I wonder how successful the university as a whole is at changing lives?

I believe lives are changed in very organic ways. I say organic to mean natural, simple, almost grassroots kinds of ways. It is the organic nature of change that has caused many "postmodern" thinking individuals to turn from church and seek a glimpse of the sacred in more relationship oriented ways. God they like, it's the church they can't stand, or so the saying goes.

It is the reason community is so important, because it is there that relationships can develop that speak to and hear directly the ills, hurts, successes, and joys of our lives. When these times are shared, they can be redeemed and shown to be Godly, sacred moments. I would venture to say freshman English doesn't make a big difference to students, but a freshman English professor can propel a student to a life of greatness. The ability to parse a sentence or understand the imagery of Hawthorne may not change the world, but a student shown God active and alive in the lives of His people can turn the world upside down. Last night, I left wondering if an accidental coach may have done more for the Kingdom than all of the dollars I raised the last five weeks.

I close with a quote from a large donor to a hospital in the mid-west (I don't have the reference on hand or I would cite it) who funded an entire children's hospital:

"I have been successful. Now it's time to be significant."

The Importance of Small Groups for Community

I don't know why I am surprised, but I was reminded again how important small groups are for a sense of community.

We had some friends over who were a part of our original small group at South Plains. As far as having people over to the house or going to eat with a couple, they are on a very short list (OK, they ARE the short list) of people we do that with any sense of regularity. We wouldn't have known them without the time together in the group.

Our groups in Tyler are the same way. Even though we do not see them often, the people in our Encounter group in Tyler remain some of the people I would consider spiritual companions. I cannot see a labyrinth or read St. Benedict's rule without thinking of those people. Our Wednesday night prayer and cookies & milk group are people we miss dearly.

We have not done a good job keeping up with those people, which may show the importance of small groups all the more. Without excusing our lack of contact, the people you are able to spend immediate time with become the people with whom you share your lives. To not have that kind of group setting eliminates those opportunities, which are very, very difficult to replace in any other context.

Again, this is no news flash, but it was a great and timely reminder for me.